Don’t wait for the perfect scenario to be good with you. It won’t happen. We can have moments of “that was amazing” or “This is the best day ever”, but perfect is just not attainable. Thank goodness because that is a lot of work to maintain, I would imagine. I don’t know because perfection is not something I strive for. Mostly to avoid any disappointment as I know it is an exercise in futility. But I digress, or maybe am creating another blog.
So, don’t wait for any scenario to be good with you. I mean, who are you walking around with anyway? YOU! No matter where you go, there you are, following, annoying and hopefully encouraging at the same time. See, you are too busy for perfection. So, if you are walking around with you, shouldn’t you like you? Shouldn’t you want to hang out with you?
Do you? Do you like your own company? Do you enjoy your solitude? I’m not talking about the time you say you are alone, but in fact, are on your computer, phone, tablet or hooked into the tv. I’m talking about the time sitting quietly in your space, or walking or connecting with the very essence that is you. ALL of you, voices in the head included! Can you be silent without exterior noise or people and be good with it?
It’s weird isn’t it? We’ve become so connected that we’ve unconnected from ourselves. The idea of being alone is so scary to some, they become leeches on others and even believe that someone else’s presence is the reason they believe they are happy or sad or mad or elated or any other feeling you can imagine. We are not Siamese twins, unless of course you are, meant to walk around so tied into another’s beingness that we cease to be one yet I meet people every week who will say, “I can’t be happy without him/her.” To which I usually ask, how long were they alive before they met this giver of happiness and then ultimately the perceived taker of happiness. It is never at birth! It is always later in life, yet the belief is that this other human holds the key to all their value. Bunk, I tell ya, bunk!
I know we are here to connect with others but it is only when we are able to be with self, that true connection can happen. Otherwise, we are simply looking to others to complete us (thanks a LOT Jerry McGuire movie!). Sure, it’s scary looking at self and seeing if there are any redeeming qualities there and if you are someone you could love but is also the most empowering thing you can do. And guess what happens when you love and like yourself? Other people do too! How cool is that?
So, take some time this week and set an intentional time, a date with self so to speak, where you tap in and ask, “Do I like me? Do I want to spend time with me? Am I afraid if I don’t connect or am I afraid if I do connect?” As I pointed out earlier, you go everywhere with you, so don’t tell me there isn’t time!
When you find that you are good hearing from you, or feeling what you feel, you will realize that alone is not loneliness. Alone is the filling up of your reservoir where loneliness is the draining. Alone is the centered place of solitude where loneliness is the, I need someone to fill me up. Loneliness happens and that is ok but living in that space is not helpful to you and your happiness.
There is one thing for certain, when you come into this world you are doing the journey alone even though people are there with you, much like when you go out, there will be souls with you, but it is still solely your journey. Don’t you want to know that you rocked it by liking you and taking the time to know how great you are?
Give it a go. Really be in that alone place this week. You may find you just love it so much, you crave it. To which I will say CONGRATULATIONS! We need more centered people in this universe! The bonus to getting to this place….you really start liking other people!
Here’s to being alone and I won’t bug you when you are. 🙂